Every marriage starts with a lot of hope and dream about lifelong association filled with love and togetherness. But very few marriages fulfill the hopes of the participants in totality.
There are various reasons for this but here we single out 6 of those. Every young person who is planning marriage should be aware of these most common pitfalls.
1. Marrying for the sake of love without first checking the depth of love.
No denying that all relationships start with a sense of love and mutual liking. Committing to a long-term relationship like marriage solely on the basis of that feeling of love is a mistake. Because most of the time this kind of feeling is superficial and can not pass the test of time. Romantic feeling dies as time passes and far more important issues like ‘family background’, ‘values’, ‘religious faith’, ‘financial stability’ raise their head, and these issues are of real importance which almost everybody with feeling of mutual love ignore.
2. Marrying someone who does not share an interest or hobby.
While marriage with a person who does not share an interest or hobby does not itself make the marriage unstable, the presence of such an interest or hobby can make life more enjoyable for both the partners. And this can make a real difference so while selecting a life partner this aspect must be taken into account.
But for some reason or other this aspect is often overlooked before marriage. And efforts start after marriage to adapt the partner to one’s own interest or develop a new common interest. While that is not an impossible task, the process of adapting may become unpalatable and may lead to unstable marriage.
3. Not knowing what questions to ask for checking compatibility.
As discussed earlier that marriage decisions based on an initial sense of love may be counterproductive. To make a marriage successful one should do some simple homework. Knowledge of future partner’s backgrounds and certain other things can play a crucial role here. But many young persons either do not try to know all these important facts or do not know what are important aspects s/he must know to make their marriage successful.
4. Thinking proper and careful quarries may offend her/him.
One may think that too much investigation about future partner’s background may not be a good idea. As the other partner may find it distasteful. This kind of thought process keeps many young men and women from asking the right questions before marriage.
5. Depending too much on a friend or relatives recommendation.
A sizable number of young men and women often get married on the recommendation of relatives or friends. While generally relatives and friends are regarded as well-wishers, marrying on their recommendation is not a good idea. As their knowledge of a person can never equal the knowledge the person has about herself or himself. So the person to be married is in a much better position to select a compatible life partner. The best way out is acting on their recommendation only after successful completion of the compatibility check.
6. Getting married to make somebody else happy.
Sometimes people get married to make someone else happy. It may be parents or it may be relatives. There is no problem in making someone happy if that does not jeopardize one’s own marriage. But most of the time in such cases marriages occur without exercising enough caution. As a result, one may end up marrying someone not compatible.
If you are really serious to make your marriage an exciting, loving, and enriching experience you need to be careful about the above things before your marriage.